Addies Friendly Feelings

Welcome back to my little series of how my stories took shape. We pick up the story of my stories in Christmas 2023.

I had got to a very good point in my inner well-being, feeling confident and having an emerging sense of positive confidence in myself and determination, both for life itself and also for the process of writing.

I preciously had 8 short conversational stories written, each around 2000-3000 words long, and described incident of a young boy, doing ordinary things in school and home, and discovering through them good ways and encounters with his emotions and feelings. They were raw, very raw, looking back at them now, but I felt and still feel extraordinarily proud of them.

But now I needed to be brave again. Brave because, these stories, needed to be more than my own healing process. They had work to do, I had work to do. I needed help.

So that a great idea wasn’t a flash in the pan that I ‘failed’ at- just like so many ideas I had had, and then experience the cyclical doom of failure.

With not much money, and no idea what I was doing I did the usual, consulted google, and found the Reedsy website, and after a number of clicks and searches, and for the first time, showed someone other than friends what I had written, as I had to submit abstracts to an audience of potential editors. Oh and I had no idea what a copy editor or developmental editor was, (again google) but I realised that I needed a developmental one, to give my work guidance and shape from its raw state to something that might be publishable…

Sorry, did I say publishable…eeeeeeeek

Because I had submitted my work, and a short blurb about what it was about, I wanted to have an editor who would know and understand what I was trying to do, and also who I could get a sense would be both gentle and firm with me – because, as you can tell the writing carried depth and was personal.

What even would someone who saw this who was ‘professional’ think.

Brave.

A decision that I may have shied away from years previously, now felt like a brave but real, and emotional step. I think I did cry when I pressed the submit button. And awaited replies who who might be interested.

I got 3 back, out of 5 I applied to.

Fortunately I found an editor who was this, who saw the stories and could be gentle, firm and see the potential in them.

Between Feb and April she read the 8 short conversational stories, and then gave me feedback on them, and a series of questions. In March and April I continued writing. I didnt want the wait of feedback to be the thing that stilted my creativity and also bringing to consciousness stories that needed to be written. There are pages and pages of coloured pen writing in now 5 A4 pads. Also, I began to share some of these stories with friends who were given me some v positive feedback, yes the writing needed work, but comments like ‘I wish these books were around when I was at school’ or ‘is this for boys, I wish my husband could read this now’ came back.

I was on the right lines.

But I was very nervous about what the editor would say. I was also excited as I kind of knew I had something in it all. I had crumbled or avoided feedback for much of my writing or work in the past. Those inner demons previously of wanting to be liked, or appreciated or helpful.

Back to the editor, it transpired that there were a number of options for me, and like a good guide, she let me make the decision on what I would want to do with them.

She also said that my writing had ‘soul’ and ‘heart’ and that I had captured the essence of the nine year old boy very well. I was very encouraged by the feedback, and in the zoom meetings we then had it was clear that I had been given the right person for this project, given that she had 3 boys under 10 and could immediately see the potential in what I was trying to do, and its need. Yes I needed to do a lot of work, but I made the right choice not to try and make the original stories perfect, they were the drafts of a beginning, the concept work of final future stories, not that I knew it at the time.

Having this kind of endorsement, and encouragement, was perfect, and so, at around the end of April 2024, I made a choice, to turn one of the original 2000 word stories, into a more developed 8000-10000 word story, with more narration, world building and character development. I also had to choose which one, for each of the original eight was focussed on one particular feeling, and so, it was important for me to choose the right one, especially if this first book, might be the first in a series……

Did I say series…?? yeah. double eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek

(but lets see and not get too carried away, long long way to go yet)

The next phase of writing was about to begin….. and things began to get even more real…